Sex Addict Song
While opening his bills, he found her envelope.
Its fragrance made him think of perfumed hotel soap.
The razor blade inside it almost cut his hand.
Note said: Your hour glass will soon run out of sand.
That girl you met last week was my paid prostitute.
You never saw the signs beneath her business suit
Don't worry, married man. No, I won’t tell your wife.
The gift you received from me will soon take your life.
You lied so many times, and, now, your payback's here.
You'll feel the pain you gave. This ain't your lucky year.
I've planned this quite a while. You won’t remember me.
Suffice to say: You're positively HIV.
His doctor soon assured him that this wasn't true.
The sender of the note: Her name he never knew.
He stopped the infidelities (he couldn't hide).
And never guessed the note was penned by his own bride.