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Permalink Reply by Elizabeth Zelvin on March 20, 2008 at 11:02pm

Thanks for sharing this story, Lee. I found it very moving--and so evocatively written it reads like literature. The pressure on cops to hang tough is less nowadays but hasn't gone away. In 2003 I talked to about 1000 uniformed NYPD officers about post-traumatic stress in the wake of 911 as well as that due to experiences on the job. I did this as a clinician for an organization with links to the Department but not part of it, because cops wouldn't go to the two or three counseling units within NYPD. They were too afraid of the consequences to their careers if they admitted they needed help. And even in the outreach I was part of, we didn't dare try to elicit any response that involved admitting in front of a group that the idea of "help" was helpful. We just presented the information and gave them the number of the anonymous hotline, which was staffed by cops trained as peer counselors.

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Permalink Reply by Lee Lofland on March 20, 2008 at 11:05pm

Hi Elizabeth. I thought you might appreciate this little story. It was someone just like you who helped me through the tough times. So, in case the guys you spoke with didn't say it, I will. Thank you.

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Permalink Reply by Karyn J. Powers on March 23, 2008 at 6:46pm

Thanks Lee. I'm sorry that you had to go through this, but I'm very glad you came out on the other side.

Many years ago we had a shootout in a motel stairway. A suicidal man was kind enough to take his misery out of his own home and check into a local motel, but wanted the police to help him on his way. A young officer on the force ended up satisfying the guy's request after shots were exchanged in a stairwell. The officer had a tough time with it, but his department and the city were completely unprepared for an officer-involved shooting and left him hanging in the press and in the small town politics for almost two years. He was a ghost. He came to work, did his job, but nobody would associate with him. Gradually, he was welcomed back into the fold and finally received a commendation, but the damage was done. He is still on the force, but has strong feelings about the price he paid for taking that shot, nearly twenty years ago.

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Permalink Reply by Karyn J. Powers on March 23, 2008 at 6:48pm

Oh, and the picture of you in the mustache.... Are you sure you weren't prom king at Logan High School, in 1976?

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