Everybody's Trying to Be My Baby....

[Kevin Burton Smith]

What does all this "friend" stuff mean, exactly?

I mean, yeah, I joined, and I promptly went through the lists, looking for people I know and consider buddies and asking them to be my "friend." It's a little pathetic, i guess, but it's sincere.

My yardstick for "friendship" is simple. Would they have a drink with me? Would I have a drink with them? Do they know me from a hole in the ground? Do I know them from a hole in the ground?

But what's the deal with all these total strangers -- or people I know but who I think should be IN a hole in the ground (and feel the same way about me) -- asking to be my friend? My mailbox is full of requests from people I don't know.

Do requests expire, or do they hang around forever? How long do I have to figure out who these people are and respond?

Am I missing the point of it all or what? If I become a friend, do I have to buy them presents at Christmas?

Or are they just kissing fanny wherever they find it?

Are we about to be beseiged by the Self-pubbies and the BSPistas?

Has Daniel created a monster?

Buy my book.

Buy my book.

Buy my book NOWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!

[Steve Allan]

I think the friend thing is a riot. I'm almost 34 and I'm accepting and rejecting friends like I'm back in junior high. Hell, I really don't turn anyone down, except that mortgage guy - who the hell would be interested in applying for a mortgage here? "Hey, Steve, how'd you go about getting your mortgage agent?" "The guy asked to be my friend on ning."

What exactly do we do with our friends anyway? Is it like creating a cabal? I thought Crimespace was the cabal.

Daniel, didn't you create this thing for world domination, sort of like the illuminati?

[Daniel Hatadi]

I've heard about the mortgage agent thing. That bugs the crap out of me. Ning will be adding the ability to block requests outside of Crimespace sometime soon.

Steve: 23

[Kevin Burton Smith]

Well, I guess you guys are right. I'm just being too paranoid or something. I'll just relax and try to live with it. I'm now clicking "Accept" all over the place.

And hey, who couldn't use more friends?

Still, I dread the day the BSPistas discover this place and it becomes one big circle jerk of self-promotion.

"Oh, your book is wonderful, Earlene. Be my friend."

"No, your review of it is wonderful, Tippy. Be my friend."

"Well, gee, I think you're both wonderful. Will you be my friends?"

"Why thank you, Dougie!"

"Hey, let's all be friends together."

"Gee, that sounds swell!"

Fade to closed bedroom door...

[Steve Allan]

To Hell with the self-promotion, I'm just waiting for the big circle jerk.