Savoring Rejection

[Dana King]

There's another discussion currently underway about rejections. I don't mean to criticize its originator; far from it, I think his attitude is healthy and he'll handle the inevitable future rejections well. My question covers writers in general:

Why do we savor our rejections?

Only writers keep files of rejection slips and letters. Every other profession moves on. I was trained as a classical musician, and used to periodically travel to out of town auditions. I don't keep the plane tickets of the auditions I lost. (Which would be all of them.) I learned what I could from the experience, and left it behind. (Out of town auditions involve flying, possibly cross-country, on your own dime to potentially sit in a room with over a hundred other competitors so you can play a five-minute audition, at the end of which the overwhelming majority of particpants will will be told to their faces, "Thank you. Next." That's rejection.)

Why do writers alone have such a fascination with rejection?

[carole gill]

I agree completely with all of that, honestly I do.
I just never saved anything--I learned a lot though!
I mean I'd never send out (now) what I sent out ten years ago.
i learned enough to know that the rejections were quite right.
Maybe it's the early ones I didn't save--maybe once I'm more certain of my work--and it's rejected--perhaps those I'd think about saving.
Of course it's a learning thing and we learn from what we go through.
and there's much to learn.
nothing I say is in concrete. I wouldn't have an open mind if that was so--so I'll reconsider my dogmatism and see what I should do.
that's as honest as I can be.

[carole gill]

Okay, I'm having a re-think here!
Just wanted to say that for what it's worth!

[carole gill]

Hmm.
Look I think it's best to write just because you love writing and being fatalistic about it (rat's ass and so on)!
i just never thought about saving them really--it hadn't occured to me.
this is the only forum I've been on--wherein I've heard and read what so many people say. I just had me before that. so it's good for me to see what others do, a good learning experience.
I probably will be afraid to throw out rejection slips now though!
I'll have to see. (gulp)!

[John McFetridge]

Maybe writing is different because it's solitary and we're desperate for some kind of communication with the outside world, some connection. Also, a rejection slip is still a marker of some success - the finished and sent out story/novel. As most stories and novels never even get finished, it's something.

Also, as Ingrid said, there's a little hope in going from form letter, to note scawled on form letter to personalized rejection.

I miss the paper when I get email rejections for stories from webzines. I also miss the weeks of waiting, to be totally honest. Last year I had a short story rejected the same day I emailed to the webzine. Now, I really appreciate the speed they got back to me, but I did miss feeling for a few weeks that I might have a story accepted.

[D. C. Hawkins]

Wow, I have a long journey ahead of me. I intend to save my first rejection (received yesterday) because it marks the milestone of the first reply to my writing from a publisher. It will not serve any bookkeeping purpose because other than the letterhead; it contains no information. I really look forward to the day when a rejection shows some evidence of human intervention. The only disconcerting feature of this rejection was the actual letter itself. It was obviously a photocopy of a photocopy of a photocopy, et cetera, to the point that the letterhead and all of the text was fuzzy and no longer close to being centered in the margins.

I found this to be unprofessional, unbusinesslike, and therefore rude.

Rant finished.

I guess I'd better get back to work to crank out a couple score more stories, striving for those wonderful sounding personal touches on the rejections.

[Eric Christopherson]

Because I plan to wallpaper my bathroom with them one day.

[carole gill]

don't know if this is for me, but I'll respond by saying that's a great idea!
maybe I'll do that too!

[Angela]

A mother looks at her newborn child for the first time and sees beauty, everyone else sees a misshapen gargantuan head, squashed nose etc... I think it may be the same with writing, we give birth to an idea and it's ours alone. I've auditioned before (theatre), but I was always performing something that someone else had given birth to. As a performer you are the parrott, as a writer you tell the parrott what to say. Also, a performance can vary. When we write it's assumed we've had time to perfect, we write and rewrite. When you perform, it's normally a one shot deal, and if your having a bad day - - too bad, plus you can't really take your crappy performance with you. With writing there is evidence.

[Angela]

Parrot...see worried about rejection even now.

[Grant McKenzie]

I had to stop saving them because I ran out of room . . . but it definitely is something that most writers do. In a strange way it helps — especially when we're unpublished — to believe in ourselves as writers. It's a legacy that shows we're creating stories and sending them out and one day, instead of rejection, we'll actually receive that all-important acceptance that says we never gave up.

[carole gill]

Just commenting here, yes. It's a documentation of our progress.
I agree now.