Crime/Action Short Film

[AdamTheAtom]

 

 

Hello Everyone. I am writing a short film. For that, I need to write a story first. In the process of coming up with ideas and trying to fit things together, I have come accross a bit of dilemma. i am not an expert in crime fiction, however I have seen The Godfather (And read the book), Donnie Brasco, Good Fellas, The Sopranos, and I bunch more in this genre, but that doesn't make me an expert. I'm not a total moron when it comes to this stuff, but I need experts to help me out.

As I have 4 actors available to me, including myself, I have 4 characters to work with.

I have come up with the base of the story, and I somewhat know where it ends too, as well as the major in between stuff. My dilemma comes from trying to figure out what must be at play in order to make those events happen. And it's basically one thing.

 

Here's what MUST happen in the story:

A contractor (One of the actors) who has great connections to highly skilled hitmen and other useful people in crime, has a right hand man (another actor) who is also very skilled. The Contractor has a connection and frequent work with a weapons craftsman (another actor), who is also skilled in combat. SOMETHING happens between them. Whatever it is, it makes the Contractor feel betrayed/threatened, thus wanting the Craftsman dead.

The Craftsman has some ethics. The Contractor is a cold, heartless bastard.

The Contractor hires a legendary hitman (last actor) to take out the Crafstman. When the hitman goes to do so, towards the end of their battle the Craftsman either does or says SOMETHING that makes the hitman do a complete 180, and goes back and tries to kill the Contractor, and that's when the Right Hand Man jumps in and protects his boss. That's not the end, but that's all that needs to be known. God forbid any of you knowing the ending, in case you decide you want to see the film lol.

 

So here's the dilemma, in case you haven't already noticed it.

WHAT must happen between the Contractor and the Craftsman that triggers the Contractor to want him dead? If I know that, then the rest will flow to me. I do need something realistic.

Multiple scenarios would be good to choose from, if any of you can come up with any.

 

I appreciate any help I get.

- Adam

[I. J. Parker]

Oh, well.  You've put the finger on the sort of thing that gives us a lot of trouble, too.  Are you offering money for the solution?  Just kidding.

[John McFetridge]

You could always make it like the contents of the briefcase in Pulp Fiction and just never tell us.

 

 

[Jack Getze]

I once heard "noir" disparagingly described as one bad guy killing another bad guy. Maybe you've got your pulse on the film-going pubic, but I don't see much of a story in what you've presented here. JMHO. You might want to think in terms of a protagonist and antagonist -- two characters who want the same thing and must battle for it.

[EDWARD C MORGAN]

Sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction and if you take some time to read the news, you can find some good ideas.

 

Probably 25 years ago, I covered an attempted murder trial. Earlier, an employee of a contractor had blown the whistle on one of the partners who owned the company. Guy got sent off to jail for a variety of fraud-related charges. The second partner (who did not go to jail) told the employee, "I'm proud of you. Did the right thing. Can't tolerate that." And then started slowly poisoning the employee.

 

It was discovered, and the second partner was sentenced.

 

Interestingly, the employee was charged, though I'm not sure what happened. Why? He admitted under oath that he was perfectly OK with the contractor bilking the insurance companies, but when he started targeting uninsured little old ladies, he just had to draw the line.

 

You just can't make that stuff up.

[AdamTheAtom]

Thanks a lot for everyone's replies.