Husbands, wives and DIY

[Vincent Holland-Keen]

A few questions from a discussion held in my office yesterday. Are all husbands legally bound to delay DIY projects for as long as humanly possible? Is there a charter that stipulates it must take at least three years from buying new knobs for a wardrobe to actually screwing them into place?

Is this the domestic cache 22? She keeps nagging him to fit that new mirror in the bathroom because he keeps putting it off and he keeps putting if off because she keeps nagging him.

While I'm never likely to find myself in the position of being a husband faced with the prospect of DIY, I feel I should get some answers beforehand, just in case.

[Karyn J. Powers]

Sorry, I couldn't pass the background check.

[norby]

I'm not that picky actually.

[Daniel Hatadi]

I tend to let burnt-out light bulbs and rickety front gates stay as they are for far too long. My main projects that I avoid getting round to are, of course, mostly writing related. But I will say that any computer / tech type stuff that needs attention gets it immediately. Sometimes, I surprise myself with the amount of tedium I endure with computers. There's a strange compulsion I have to get to the end of the problem and solve it. I'm not at ease until that happens.

The DIY problem is that the idea of the project is more interesting than the actual project. It's the hunt for something new that appeals, not the tedious stuff that comes afterwards.

[Vincent Holland-Keen]

Yeah, I also find something strangely compelling about trying to fix a computer-related issue, however frustrating it may be. Unless, that is, it's my Dad's computer-related issue and he's rung up out of the blue to ask me how to do something either incredibly simple or something I couldn't possibly figure out without super-psychic mind powers.

[Daniel Hatadi]

What's even better is when your dad rings you to get computer help for his next-door neighbour. And he's willing to pay. I guess it would be fine if that's what I did for a living, but offering to pay me to come and fix your computer is like hiring me as your toilet cleaner. I just don't want to do it, even if the money's good.

Umm, yeah. I have issues. :)

[Vincent Holland-Keen]

Oh, so you didn't go fix his neighbour's computer then? Shame, 'cos my toilet needs a clean and I've got a A$5 note needing to be spent ;)

[Donna Moore]

I'm with Sandra on this. I am totally useless, and, added to that, I am accident prone. This is not a good combination. The thing is, my ex was even more cackhanded than me at DIY stuff, so I still ended up doing it. I painted the kitchen a couple of years ago and fell off the ladder into a tray of paint...arse first...When I managed to scrabble out, I fell onto the floor...arse first. My first thought when getting up was not "Oh no, how am I going to get that paint off the floor" but "Jeez, my arse is HUGE" and a mental note never to wear yellow.

[Sandra Ruttan]

I think we may have been separated at birth Donna!

[LC Fraser]

Donna, honey, tell me you weren't on the ladder in high heels? Cuz that would explain a lot.

[Patricia Abbott]

Between us, my husband and I have one DIY ability-- to hang wallpaper and unfortunately wallpaper seems to be out of fashion just now. We cannot use drills so things fall out of thw wall especially curtain rods. We cannot deal with cables, computers or anything electric. We write all day because its the only thing we can do.

[Daniel Hatadi]

Sounds like the perfect life, Patti!

[Jude Hardin]

How many crime writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to replace the bulb (with, of course, a surpising twist at the end); one to be a witness; a third to shoot the witness.

Got any more?